Amtrak Is For Lovers
by PacificRomance
Summary: No joke" she says,"I'll leave you. I'd never think to treat you like this, I can't believe it. I'll give you three more chances, then I'm gone for good"
1. Chapter 1

A/N: I literally wrote this in like 20 minutes. I don't really like the Chuck in this story, I don't think he would really be like this, but this was just so easy to write and that was how he came out, so I went with it. Hope you like it!

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He knew he messed up. Again. It wasn't the first time, and it probably wouldn't be the last. But he was trying. Even if she couldn't tell, he really was trying to be better. He knew that she was at her limit. He was on thin ice. One more mistake and that could be it for him, and for them. He knew this, and yet he still kept fucking up.

In the beginning everything had been great. That first summer together had been perfect. When he came back from Europe, with all those perfectly wrapped, well thought out gifts and told her he loved her, it had opened the door to the kind of happiness he had never experienced before. Together they had been perfect, epic even. After he said those words, talking wasn't necessary. In those following months he could tell her everything with a simple kiss. That was how deep their connection was.

But as time passed, they began to drift apart. He immersed himself in his work and she began classes at NYU. They were still together, but things weren't the same. He wasn't her perfect dark prince anymore. He screwed up. A lot. And even though he knew it, he kept doing it, and she kept taking him back.

At first, he was able to soothe her and win her back with his simple charm and their sexual tension. But eventually those things were not enough. Now when they fought and when she threatened to leave, he had resulted to begging.

He would come home to find her in his closest, fingering through his many suits, pausing over some of her favorites. Usually she would be in jeans and a t-shirt, too upset to dress up. He was pretty sure she didn't know it, but when she was dressed down like that was when he found her sexiest. It was by far his favorite of her outfits.

But when he comes home to find her like that, he knows that she is well aware of what he's done. When she heard him come in, she would turn to him with a simple, defeated look on her face and just sigh. She would always say pretty much the same thing.

"Chuck, I wasn't kidding last time. If you keep doing this, I'll leave. I-, I can't stay here with someone who obviously has no respect for me. I would never, ever treat you like this. As much as I don't want to believe it, it seems like you are never going to change. When you told me you loved me, I fell for it. I believed you. But now, I don't know what to believe"

He would immediately grab onto her. Whether it was her arm, or her hand, or her cheek; he just had to touch her. "Blair, I meant what I said. I do love you. I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry. I'm not perfect. I'm not Nate. You knew I would mess up, but I'm trying. I really am. You have to believe me." His speech was always the same.

She would just shake her head when he said this. "I can't believe you, Chuck. You always say you're sorry, and you always do it again. I don't know why I keep forgiving you, why I keep coming back. But I can't keep doing this. Three more chances, Chuck. That's it. Then I'm gone; for good this time."

Three chances. That's what she always said. It didn't matter how many chances he used up, he always had three more. It should give him some sort of security, but in reality it only made him more anxious. He was just waiting for the time she didn't give him those chances and she left. He knew she was close to her breaking point, but he didn't know how to fix things anymore.

After she spoke, he always pulled her in close, holding her to him. He would whisper into her hair how he was worth it. How _they _were worth it. He would apologize for not being better at expressing his feelings and showing her how he felt. She would cry a bit and then they would fall asleep in each other's arms and start over the next day.

But now that routine was over.

It was a Friday night and she had been sitting on the train for the last six hours. As she sat, she thought about what had finally broken her.

He was coming back from a trip to out to Connecticut where he had visited some board members. It was supposed to be their 3 year anniversary that weekend, so she thought she'd surprise him at the train station with her gifts for him. While she waited, she kept looking over her gifts as she constantly glanced up at the clock. She had missed him so much, and she was so anxious to see him. She felt like she had been waiting forever when his train finally arrived. She saw him before he saw her. He was wearing her favorite suit. It was blue and orange; bright and obnoxious; tailored, fashionable, and so _him_. Only he could pull off that suit. But he didn't even notice her until he was right in front of her. He was too busy flirting with a beautiful, tall, exotic-looking woman in a tight skirt. When he did finally see her, she had already dropped the carefully arranged gifts and begun to walk out of the train station. He only saw her back. He didn't see the tears that were streaming down her face as she tried her best to hold her head high.

When she got back to the apartment, she packed a bag and turned right around to return to the train station. She got on a train heading west. She didn't really know where she was going, but she knew she needed to get away. All these years she had spent forgiving him and taking him back, hoping he would change, but he hadn't. That had finally become clear to her.

There were very few things she regretted in her life; attacking Serena when she came back from boarding school, ruining her chances at Yale, and falling in love with _him_. She had decided not even to think his name. She had tried so many times to say good-bye to him. But she had never been strong enough. He always managed to creep back into her life, but not this time. She had to count on this good-bye to be the last one. She had to be done with him, for her own survival.

And as she sat on the train, unsure of her destination, it hit her like a ton of bricks; it was over. She wouldn't be going back to him. She hadn't given him those last three chances she promised, but she had given him hundreds before that. She didn't doubt that he loved her, but he didn't love her enough. He didn't love her enough to be better, to change and prove to her that he could be the man he claimed he could be. It hadn't been enough, and now she need to leave because if she stayed she would break, and as much as she loved him, she couldn't let that happen to herself.

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A/N: If you couldn't tell from the title, or the story, this is based on the song "Amtrak is For Lovers" by Houston Calls. I have a bunch of songs that I think would fit for Chuck and Blair, so hopefully I'll get a few more of them written soon. I don't usually like song fics that have the lyrics and try to fit a story word for word with the song, so I didn't put the lyrics and while there are lines from the song, they are not in order and not all of them are word for word. Please please please review! Thanks!


	2. Chapter 2

After she left him, he didn't just let her go. Of course he kept an eye on her. He knew she was in Chicago. He knew she had a great job with a well-known accounting firm. He knew exactly which building she was living in. He knew that she went out with men occasionally but things never went further than a second date. He knew she spent most nights and weekends alone and at home. He knew she hadn't made any close friends since she had moved. His people were never seen and they never interfered with her life, but he had to have someone watch over her, he had to know that she was okay.

She had been gone for almost two years and she had yet to return to New York even once; even for a simple visit. Eleanor and Cyrus went out to see her for the holidays and Serena had spent the occasional weekend with her, but other than that, she had completely cut ties with New York.

Ever since she had moved to Chicago he had done his very best to avoid the place. As he had explained to her a few years earlier, he wanted her to be happy, even if it meant he had to let her go. So he kept tabs on her in Chicago, making sure she was safe and seemingly happy, and he stayed away. Even though it was the third largest city in the United States, he knew that if they were in the same city there was no way they would be able to avoid each other. They were like magnets. He didn't want to chance running into her and interfering with her new life and he knew that once he saw her he wouldn't be able to let her go again.

But he had accepted a business deal with one of the most prestigious investors in the Windy City. An investor who happened to be the biggest client of the accounting firm she worked for. Chuck knew that more than doubled his chances of running into her, but there was nothing he could do. The investor refused to negotiate with anyone but the CEO of Bass Industries, so Chuck had to be there, he had no choice. There was no way the board would let him turn down yet another multi-million dollar business opportunity simply because he didn't want to travel to Chicago. So he made his trip short, just enough time to meet with the investor and finalize the deal, in the hope that he could somehow avoid her.

When he arrived to the meeting, Chuck was feeling pretty good. He had been in Chicago for a few hours and he had managed to make it to the investor's building without seeing her. As he shook the man's hand the investor gave him an easy smile, "James Smith. It's nice to finally meet you, Mr. Bass."

Chuck gave him a slight nod as he moved to take his seat at the table with the advisers and lawyers that were present. Mr. Smith moved over to the table as he continued, "Gentlemen, we'll be able to start shortly. Some important files were left at the accountant's office, but they are being brought over as we speak."

Chuck got a strange feeling in his stomach. He tried to ignore it. _She_ wouldn't be the one coming. She had a fairly high position in the company. Delivery errands were reserved for simple interns, not smart, valuable employees like her.

As he started to relax, the door to the conference room opened, and the breath was knocked out of him. It was her. She looked just as beautiful as ever. She was in a classy yet stylish suit and her hair was free-flowing down her back. She was absolutely perfect.

She had a polite smile on her face as she took a step into the room towards her boss, but then she spotted Chuck and her eyes went wide in shock and panic. He immediately rose to his feet and straightened his jacket. "Blair." He couldn't stop himself from saying her name. It had been too long. There was just a hint of desperation in his eyes, but he couldn't compose himself. He couldn't look away. She was right there; a mere feet away from him, after all this time.

She quickly tore her eyes away from his searching gaze and composed herself. She walked up to the table, with her smile once again firmly in place. "Here's the folder you asked for, Mr. Daily." She said as she handed it over.

"Thank you, Ms. Waldorf, I really appreciate you help. Now why don't you take a seat? I did say you could sit in on the meeting. You've worked so hard, and I know you will appreciate the experience and knowledge you will gain."

"I-"She chanced a quick glance across the table. Chuck was still standing. He didn't want to give her a chance to escape. "I don't think that this is the best time. I really am grateful for the offer though, and I hope that it will be extended again in the future."

"Of course, Ms Waldorf. I understand. The firm is quite busy this time of year. You probably have a lot of work to get to."

She gave the older man a tight smile, "Well, I better get going, lots of paper work to get to."

And with that she turned around and walked out of the room without even giving Chuck a second look. Before the door had clicked shut, he was moving across the room. At the door he turned around to the surprised men at the table. He spoke in his smooth, convincing way as he said, "Excuse me gentlemen, I just have to take care of some long over do business. I'll be back shortly."

Once he was out of the room, he looked down the hall and saw her walking as quickly as possible towards the elevator. He ran down the hall as he called her name. "Blair!" She didn't even turn. She continued on her way as if he had not even spoken, although her pace increased just a little bit.

But she was in high heels, and he was just a little too fast for her. "Blair." He gasped as he grabbed her wrist and turned her around. "Geez, Waldorf, where's the fire?" He panted as he leaned against the wall to catch his breath.

She crossed her arms across her chest defensively as she scowled, "What do you want, Chuck?"

He took another breath and looked at her sincerely, "How have you been?"

She raised her eyebrows at him skeptically, "You ran out of your important meeting just to ask me how I am?"

He snorted as he smirked, "No. I ran out here to convince you to go to dinner with me tonight. I was just going through some of the formalities."

She shook her head and dropped her arms, "I don't think dinner is the best idea…"

"Come on, Waldorf." He took a slight step towards her and looked into her eyes, "I just want the opportunity to catch up. You disappeared without so much as a simple text two years ago and you can't give me one night to see how you are doing?"

She sighed and looked away as she shook her head again. He reached out and lightly brushed her cheek, causing her to jolt up and look at him again. The spark was still there. She felt it in the simple touch. "Please, Blair. It's just dinner. We can go anywhere you want. How does that Italian place, Teresa and Anthony's, sound?"

She gave him a quizzical look as she moved a few steps back. He took a step to follow her, but she held up her hand. "It sounds great." She said sharply. "I'll meet you there at eight." She turned to leave without waiting for his answer.

"Eight is perfect." He said with a smirk as he went back to his meeting. He wanted to get the deal done as quickly as possible so he could go back to his hotel and get ready for his date.

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He got to the restaurant fifteen minutes early and took a seat at the bar to wait for her to arrive. When eight o'clock rolled around, he wasn't surprised that she hadn't showed up yet. Waldorfs always arrived late; they liked to make an entrance. When she was a half hour late he began to get suspicious, and when she didn't show up by nine, he knew she wasn't coming. But Chuck Bass doesn't get stood up without a fight. He figured he had nothing to lose, so he instructed his driver to take him to her building.

Once he arrived, he pounded on her door impatiently. He could hear her making her way to the door "I'm coming, I'm coming." She wrenched the door open, only to stand there in shock. Chuck looked her up and down, taking in her appearance. Her hair was in messy waves and she had no make-up on. She was wearing a short, dark nightgown and a sheer robe. It was obvious that she was not planning on going out that night.

She pulled her robe tighter around her as she glared at him, "Chuck, what are you doing here?"

"You didn't come to dinner." He said pointedly.

"How do you know where I live?" she cried indignantly.

He smirked at her, "I think you already know the answer to that. It's why you didn't show up to dinner, isn't it?"

She narrowed her eyes in anger, "You knew I was in Chicago; you knew where my apartment was; you even knew my favorite restaurant! It's pretty obvious you had me followed, Chuck. I cannot believe you, Bass, you will never change!"

"Is it really so unbelievable, Waldorf?" He gave her a dark, questioning look as he moved into her apartment. She slammed the door and turned to him with her hands on her hips as he continued, "Did you think you could just hop a train out of my life and I would just let you go? That I would be able to carry on with my life not knowing if you were safe, or healthy, or even alive?"

"Yes, Chuck, that's exactly what I thought! You never gave a shit about me when we were together, so I figured when I left you would just continue with your womanizing ways."

He took a few menacing steps towards her, "Don't you _ever_ think that I didn't care about you. I have always only wanted the best for you."

"Bullshit."

He reached towards her, "Blair-" His voice was still harsh but there was an edge of sincerity in his eyes as he looked at her.

"Don't." She slapped his hand away, "Don't try to act like you care. It's not going to work on me anymore. Don't say that you're sorry. Don't tell me you're going to change, or that you love me. I won't believe it anymore."

He took a step closer to her and his voice had a pleading tone, "Blair I _do_ love you; I always have."

She sneered at him, "Oh really? Did you love me while you were away on your 'business trips'? Or while you were screwing your secretary? Or when you were picking up girls at the Palace? Or when you were hitting on that model at the train station?" She paused before continuing in a softer voice, "You know, despite all those things, I thought you really did love me, in your own way. But now, looking back, I realize how fucked up that is. You never loved me, you just thought you did."

Chuck sighed and ran his hand through his hair. "Blair, I know it doesn't seem like it, but I did love you, I still do. Your happiness has always been my biggest concern." He saw that she was about to interrupt, and he held up his hand to quiet her. "I don't know why I screwed up so much; or why I always went after other girls. Maybe it's because I never felt good enough for you. Maybe I was just trying to live up to the expectations everyone had for me. Maybe I felt like you deserved better. Maybe I was just scared of change. Maybe I was scared of how dependent I had become on you. There are a million excuses I could give you, but when it comes down to it, I don't know why I did any of the things I did. All I know is that I have never wanted anything more than I want for you to be happy."

"Chuck, stop lying to me." She shook her head sadly.

"I'm not lying, Blair." He said boldly as he grabbed her arm so she would look at him. "I have avoided this city for two years just because I wanted to give you space; to give you the opportunity to be happy here. It's killed me to know exactly where you are and not go to you. I've turned down plenty of business deals because I didn't want to even chance running into you."

She straightened her shoulders and looked at him irritably, "Then why did you do this deal? Since you knew where I worked, you had to know that Mr. Smith is one of our biggest clients. You had to have known that there was a strong possibility that we would meet up."

His hand dropped from her arm and he looked to the ground, "I did. But I didn't care anymore." He looked back up at her as he moved closer until her back was against the wall. "I couldn't stay away anymore; it was too hard. Blair, I love you, and I know I've said it before, but I've changed. Once you left I realized how stupid I've been." He took her hand in his and looked down as his thumb stroked her knuckles. He spoke softly, "I haven't been with anyone since you left. I don't want anyone else. I want you."

"I have a life here." She whispered in response. He looked up only to see that her gaze was focused on her feet.

He placed his hand on her chin and tilted her eyes to his, "There is nothing here for you. There are no close friends, no boyfriend, and no fancy parties on the weekend. All you have is your job, and you could get one just like it, if not better, in New York. You love the city. You love your parents and Serena and your friends. You love being treated like royalty. You love the attention. Here, no one knows who you are. In New York you would go back to being the queen you have always been. Come back with me."

He looked at her pleadingly, but she just shook her head and looked away again. "I told you once that I wasn't going to be weak anymore, but if I go back with you that is exactly what I'll be." She looked at him pleadingly, "I love you Chuck, and I probably always will, but being with you hurts so much. You say you've changed, but how can I really know that? How do I know that once I come back you won't go right back to how things were before? "

"I won't, I promise. Blair, if there is one thing I've learned in the last two years; it's that I need you. I love you, Waldorf."

She looked into his pleading eyes with tears falling down her face. He reached up to wipe them away as she spoke, "I love you too, which is why I need to stay away. You have too much control over me. I let you hurt me for over three years and if I go back with you, chances are that I'll just end up hurt again."

Chuck got a resigned look on his face as drop his hand from her face, "You're probably right. You deserve so much more than anything I could give you. I've screwed up way too much to ever be worthy of you. I'm sorry for intruding on your life here."

He turned to leave, but stopped at the door and turned to look at her again, "I know you're not happy here. I know you miss the city. You should move back east. I won't bother you if you do, I promise. I know you have good reason not to trust me, but I was telling the truth when I said I only want for you to be happy. If you move back to New York you won't have to worry about me intruding on your life."

"Chuck-"

"It's fine. I understand. I love you too much to hurt you anymore. Have a good life, Blair." He quietly closed the door and walked back to his car.

He didn't know she was watching him leave from her window or he probably would have walked with his back a little straighter and his head a little higher. He probably would have walked with a little more swagger in his step, and he probably wouldn't have stopped in the middle of the sidewalk and put his head in his hands. He probably would have waited until he got in the car to wipe away the few tears that had fallen onto his cheeks.

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A/N: Don't worry, there will be a third chapter. I wouldn't leave things like this! I've wanted to continue this story for a while and a few of you have asked for more after the sad ending of the first chapter, but it has just been so difficult to write! It just hasn't been turning out how I originally planned it, but I think its okay. I was going to finish it in this chapter, but I decided to split it up. Thanks for reading and reviews are always appreciated!


	3. Chapter 3

After he returned from Chicago, Chuck isolated himself more than ever. When Blair had left him the first time he had mostly cut himself off from the world, but he still occasionally spent time with his step-family or went out to get a drink with his best friend. But ever since he got back from Chicago, he only split his time between the office and his suite. He rarely ventured anywhere else unless it was for business. There were too many prying eyes and desperate women at the bars and he no longer desired to spend time with the Vander Woodsens or Nate.

On his flight back from the Windy City, one of his P.I.s called him to let him know that Blair had quit her job, so he wasn't surprised when two weeks later he received word that she had moved back to New York. He knew that Serena and Nate were wary of his reaction to the news and they were ready for him to make some sort of move, but he remained faithful to his promise. He didn't try to contact her. He didn't go to her apartment. And he never went out anymore, so she didn't have to worry about running into him.

But she found herself wishing they would come into contact somehow. She knew it was naïve and weak and pathetic, but she missed him. She hadn't admitted it to him, but she accepted his pathetic attempt at an apology and she still loved him. Despite everything he had done to her, she still loved him. And she believed him when he had said that he loved her too. _This _was the exact reason why she had left; why she had needed to avoid him. She would always give in to him. She couldn't stop caring about him, no matter how hard she tried.

A few days after she moved back to New York, she talked to Serena about it, about her inability to walk away; her inability to forget him. Blair told her all about his visit, his apology, and his promise to stay away. The blonde's response surprised her. She said she wasn't shocked by his speech. She said that he hadn't been the same since Blair left. She said that he had actually become quite the hermit since she left; that he tried to avoid social settings, especially when there would be a lot of single women present. She said that he got a wistful look on his face when her name was mentioned; that he obviously regretted his actions in their relationship.

Blair was shocked. Not because she hadn't believed Chuck when he said the same things, but because Serena was actually defending him. Serena had always been one of the biggest supporters of her relationship with Chuck, but she knew how much he had hurt Blair, so if she believed he had changed, then he probably had.

After she left Serena's, Blair found herself outside his suite. She didn't know how she got there, and she wasn't even sure why she was there, but before she could process what she was doing, she knocked on his door. He opened the door with disbelief clear on his face. He tried to cover it up with a cool exterior, but Blair had always been able to read him like a book.

Before he could say or do anything she stepped around him into the apartment. She walked right in, placed her purse on the table and took her coat off. He had closed the door, but he was just standing in the entryway completely speechless. She turned to him with her shoulders slumped dejectedly, "I don't know why I'm here, so don't even ask. I just got finished talking to Serena and the only place I wanted to come was here."

"Blair, I-, I don't know what to say." He kept his distance with a blank look on his face. He had no clue why she was there, and he didn't want to get his hopes up. He thought she had wanted space. He thought she didn't want to see him, yet here she was, in his suite.

"I don't either, Chuck." She said exasperatedly, "All I know is that ever since you came to my apartment in Chicago and ever since I've been back here in New York, all I've wanted is to see you. I know you said you would stay away, and I know that it is for the best, but I just can't stay away. Because despite everything you've done and all the lies you've told me, I still love you, you Basstard."

"Blair." Chuck took a hesitant step towards her. When she didn't immediately recoil he took a few more steps until he was able to place his hands on her arms. Her eyes were focused on the ground, but he stooped down to try and meet her gaze, "Blair," She finally looked up to meet his eyes, "Are you happier when you are with me?" He asked slowly, "Without the other women and my emotional distance; are you happy?"

Blair looked up at him with tears in her eyes, "Chuck, I-"

"Just answer me honestly. I'm not the Chuck I was when you left. I've changed; though I think Serena made you realize that. If you can say that you are really happy when you are with me, then we can make this work. I know you were happy with me once, and I know that I hurt you. I know it's selfish of me to ask you to risk your heart yet again on me, but I _am_ selfish, Blair, and I want to be with you. If you feel just the slightest bit better when you are with me, then why can't we try again?"

She was again looking at the ground as she slowly shook her head. "You're wrong." She lifted her head with a hint of a smile to look right at his devastated face. "Serena didn't convince me; you did, when you came to Chicago."

He stared at her in shock. He had thought she was going to say he had only caused her pain and misery, which he had most of the time. But when he wasn't messing up their relationship, when he wasn't stomping on her heart, her time with him had been the best time of her life. "Chuck, I think you're ready; I think _we're_ ready. We can do this; we can make this work. I just spent two years trying to move on and forget you, but it didn't work. I moved halfway across the country, and yet seeing you for just a few hours brought back all the same feelings I had the last time we were together. I know I could never be with anyone else, but I don't think I could handle it if you hurt me again-"

"I won't" He pleaded earnestly.

"I know you won't. I can see it in your eyes. I've always known you better than anyone, Bass." She said with a chuckle as she moved closer to him. She put her hands on her shoulders and raised her face to his as she bit her lip nervously, "So what would you say to me moving back in here?"

"I'd say everything is right were you left it, Princess." He whispered against her lips.

She pulled back before he was able to kiss her and searched his face, "You kept all my stuff? After all this time?"

He smirked at her, "I couldn't bear to throw anything away. It was all I had left of you." He ducked his head in embarrassment, "I guess I figured that as long as I kept your stuff around, you weren't really gone for good. You would come back, at least to pack up the rest of your things."

She rested her forehead against his with a small smirk, "Well you were right, I did come back. But I'm not going to pack up; I think I'll just leave everything here, if that's alright." He let out a soft laugh as she moved her mouth closer to his and continued, "Maybe I'll do some unpacking too; I picked up a few things in Chicago."

Before he could answer, she kissed him. It was the most fulfilling kiss he had ever experienced. It was like they had never been apart, they still moved perfectly in sync; knowing exactly what to do, where to touch, how to make each other feel the most pleasure. Sure, they had had blissful times as a couple before, but this time it was different; they both could feel it. They were finally ready, finally mature enough to be together and make it work. They had always known that their love was forever, and now they sure that they could spend that forever together.


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